Bystand

Oktober 6, 2013 at 10:40 nm 14 Kommentaar

Ek is ‘n ma. Ek is altyd op bystand. Vir die hond, die kat, die hadida’s om nou nie eers Homer en die kinders (almal het reeds die huis verlaat) te noem nie. Ma’s weet dit. Ons is gewoond daaraan.

Dan gaan jy nou in die werkplek uit en daar is mos ‘n stelsel vir alles in plek. Een daarvan is bystand. Homer werk in ‘n ander dorp sowat 140km weg. Hy is elke derde naweek op bystanddiens. Dan kom hy nie huis toe nie, dan bly hy in die dorp waar hy werk sodat hy beskikbaar is wanneer hy by die werk nodig sou wees. Ai, tog, hy was nog nooit ‘n naweek tuis sonder dat die werk hom gebel het nie. Nou nie dat ek kla nie. Dan weer, hy kry nie oortyd betaling nie, so dalk moet ek kla. Lank en hard. Dikwels lui die telefoon in die nag, dikwels het hy al soos in dadelik na aankoms teruggery werk toe en dan eers dae later vir ‘n tydperk langer as agt ure na sy lêplek teruggekeer. Ek praat onder korreksie, maar ek dink hy kry wel ‘n bystandtoelaag. Wat beteken hy moet beskikbaar wees wanneer hy wel op bystanddiens is. Hy is. Hy is ook beskikbaar self wanneer hy nie op bystanddiens is nie. Soos die naweek.

As ek nou gaan sê hy het al ses oproepe gekry en twaalf gemaak sedert hy Vrydagaand tuis gekom het, sal dit ‘n beskeie raai skatting wees. Die helfte van die twaalf oproepe na dieselfde persoon. Die mens wie op bystand is. Die mens wie altyd die eerste oproep antwoord en dan oppad werk toe is. Maar natuurlik nie daar uitgekom het nie.

Dis sulke kere dat mans seker uitvind hoe ma’s op bystand voel. Ekskuus. Ma’s is nie regtig op bystand nie, ons bly aan diens. Of dit nou ‘n sms, bbm, W/A, oproep of sommer net die stem uit die kombuis is, as jy geroep word, dan gaan jy, of hoe? Net as jy ‘n ma is.

Gedagte van die dag: Sterkte aan almal op bystand.

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Entry filed under: Bitch en Moan.

‘n Paar vir Klip Lekker lekker.

14 Kommentaar Add your own

  • 1. Klip  |  Oktober 7, 2013 om 9:21 vm

    Goeie more…

    Mev Klip is al 32jr aan diens,ek het baie respek vir al die mammas en vrouens(tuisteskeppers!!)wat altyd daar is vir almal.

    Antwoord
  • 2. Klip  |  Oktober 7, 2013 om 9:25 vm

    One afternoon a man came home from work to find total mayhem in his house. His three children were outside, still in their pajamas, playing in the mud, with empty food boxes and wrappers strewn all around the front yard. The door of his wife’s car was open, as was the front door to the house.

    Proceeding into the entry, he found an even bigger mess. A lamp had been knocked over, and the throw rug was wadded against one wall. In the front room the TV was loudly blaring a cartoon channel, and the family room was strewn with toys and various items of clothing. In the kitchen, dishes filled the sink, breakfast food was spilled on the counter, dog food was spilled on the floor, a broken glass lay under the
    table, and a small pile of sand was spread by the back door.

    He quickly headed up the stairs, stepping over toys and more piles of clothes, looking for his wife. He was worried she may be ill, or that something serious had happened. He found her lounging in the bedroom,
    still curled in the bed in her pajamas, reading a novel. She looked up at him, smiled, and asked how his day went.

    He looked at her bewildered and asked, “What happened here today?”

    She again smiled and answered, “You know every day when you come home from work and ask me what in the world I did today?”

    “Yes,” was his incredulous reply.

    She answered, “Well, today I didn’t do it.

    Antwoord
    • 3. Olga  |  Oktober 7, 2013 om 4:52 nm

      Bravo!!!!!!!!!!!! 🙂

      Antwoord
  • 4. Klip  |  Oktober 7, 2013 om 9:33 vm

    A blonde and a brunette are both in an elevator.

    On the third floor a man gets on who’s perfect: Italian suit, handsome, great build with a nice butt, but unfortunately they both notice he has a bad case of dandruff.

    The man gets off on the 5th floor.

    Once the doors close, the brunette turns to the blonde and says, “Someone should give him Head & Shoulders.”

    To which the blonde replies, “How do you give Shoulders?”

    Antwoord
  • 5. Kameel  |  Oktober 7, 2013 om 1:16 nm

    Ek verstaan beide…. ‘n man wat af en toe huistoe kom, en ‘n ma aan diens en ‘n oor wat bereid is om na al die “wow is me” van die lewe te luister.

    Antwoord
    • 6. Olga  |  Oktober 7, 2013 om 4:52 nm

      Jy ken van Sally.

      Antwoord
  • 7. Klip  |  Oktober 7, 2013 om 2:09 nm

    The secretary came in late for work for the third day in a row.

    The boss called her into his office and said, “Now look Sharon, I know we had a wild fling for a while, but that’s over. I expect you to conduct yourself like any other employee around here. Who told you you could come and go as you please around here?”

    Sharon simply smiled, lit up a cigarette, and while exhaling said, “My lawyer.”

    Antwoord
  • 8. Klip  |  Oktober 8, 2013 om 4:27 nm

    “Mum, teacher was asking me today if I have any brothers or sisters who will be coming to school.”

    “That’s nice of her to take such an interest, dear. What did she say when you told her you are the only child?”

    She just said, “Thank goodness!”

    Antwoord
  • 10. Klip  |  Oktober 8, 2013 om 4:33 nm

    Nine year old Joey was asked by his mother what he had learned at Sunday school.

    “Well, Mom, our teacher told us how God sent Moses behind enemy lines on a rescue mission to lead the Israelites out of Egypt. When he got to the Red Sea, he had his engineers build a pontoon bridge and all the people walked across safely.

    “Then he used his walkie – talkie to radio headquarters for reinforcements. They sent bombers to blow up the bridge and all the Israelites were saved.”

    “Now, Joey, is that really what your teacher taught you?” his mother asked.

    “Well, no, Mom. But if I told it the way the teacher did, you’d never believe it!”

    Antwoord
  • 11. Klip  |  Oktober 8, 2013 om 5:04 nm

    A little girl was out with her Grandmother when they came across a couple of dogs mating on the sidewalk.

    “What are they doing, Grandma?” asked the little girl.

    The grandmother was embarrassed, so she said, “The dog on top has hurt his paw, and the one underneath is carrying him to the doctor.”

    “They’re just like people, aren’t they Grandma?”

    “How do you mean?” asked the Grandma.

    “Offer someone a helping hand,” said the little girl, “…and they screw you every time!”

    Antwoord
    • 12. Olga  |  Oktober 8, 2013 om 10:07 nm

      slim kind.

      Antwoord
  • 13. Klip  |  Oktober 9, 2013 om 6:19 nm

    Attention Children – The Bathroom Door is Closed!

    Please do not stand here and talk, whine, or ask questions.

    Wait until I get out.

    Yes, it is locked. I want it that way. It is not broken, and I am not trapped.

    I know I have left it unlocked, and even open at times, since you were born, because I was afraid some horrible tragedy might occur while I was in there, but it’s been 10 years and I want some PRIVACY.

    Do not ask me how long I will be. I will come out when I am done.

    Do not bring the phone to the bathroom door.

    Do not go running back to the phone yelling “She’s in the BATHROOM!”

    Do not begin to fight as soon as I go in.

    Do not stick your little fingers under the door and wiggle them. This was funny when you were two.

    Do not slide pennies, LEGOs, or notes under the door. Even when you were two this got a little tiresome.

    If you have followed me down the hall talking, and are still talking as you face this closed door, please turn around, walk away, and wait for me in another room. I will be glad to listen to you when I am done.

    And yes, I still love you.

    Mom

    Antwoord
    • 14. Olga  |  Oktober 10, 2013 om 5:16 nm

      ek sal dit bêre vir my kleinkinders.

      Antwoord

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